You Never Know What Someone Is Carrying: A Suicide Prevention Month Reminder

September is Suicide Prevention Month, but the conversations we have this month shouldn't end when September does.

Every day, we interact with family members, friends, coworkers, employees, customers, neighbors, and even strangers without knowing everything they may be carrying.

Someone can smile, go to work, take care of their family, run a business, teach a classroom, help others, and still be struggling privately.

That's why one of the most important things we can do for one another is simply pay attention, check in, listen, and take concerns seriously.

Sometimes "I'm Fine" Doesn't Mean Everything Is Fine

Most of us have asked someone, "How are you?"

And most of us have automatically answered that same question with:

"I'm fine."

But sometimes we aren't.

A person experiencing emotional distress may not know how to ask for help. They may be afraid of being judged, embarrassed about what they're experiencing, or worried about becoming a burden to someone else.

Sometimes reaching out begins with someone else noticing a change and caring enough to ask another question.

Instead of stopping at "How are you?" consider asking:

"How are you really doing?"

And then give the person an opportunity to answer.

Know Some of the Warning Signs

There isn't one specific behavior that tells us someone is considering suicide. However, significant changes in a person's behavior, mood, or communication can be reasons to pay closer attention.

Warning signs may include:

• Talking about wanting to die

• Expressing hopelessness or feeling as though there is no way out

• Saying they feel like a burden

• Withdrawing from family, friends, coworkers, or activities

• Extreme or unexpected mood changes

• Giving away important belongings

• Saying goodbye in unusual ways

• Significant changes in sleeping or eating

• Increased use of alcohol or drugs

• Talking about having no reason to live

If something concerns you, don't dismiss it simply because you're unsure what to say.

It's Okay to Ask Directly

If you're concerned that someone may be thinking about suicide, it's okay to ask them directly:

"Are you thinking about suicide?"

Asking the question does not cause someone to become suicidal.

You also don't need to be a counselor or mental health professional to show someone that you care.

Listen.

Don't judge.

Take what they're telling you seriously.

Help them connect with appropriate support.

And if you believe they're in immediate danger, don't leave them alone while seeking emergency assistance.

Check on the People Who Always Seem Strong

Sometimes we naturally check on the person who is visibly struggling.

But remember to check on the people who appear to have everything together, too.

Check on the friend everyone calls when they have a problem.

Check on the caregiver who spends all day taking care of someone else.

Check on the business owner carrying responsibilities no one sees.

Check on the teacher who pours everything into their students.

Check on the parent who is always taking care of the family.

Check on the coworker who is usually smiling.

Strong people need support, too.

Small Acts of Connection Matter

Supporting someone doesn't always require a grand gesture.

Send the text.

Make the phone call.

Invite someone to lunch.

Sit and listen.

Ask the second question.

Tell someone you're thinking about them.

Follow up tomorrow.

Sometimes we assume someone already has plenty of people checking on them.

Don't assume.

Be one of those people.

Create Communities Where It's Okay to Ask for Help

Suicide prevention isn't only an individual responsibility. We can also work toward creating families, workplaces, businesses, schools, organizations, and communities where people feel comfortable saying:

"I'm struggling."

"I need help."

"Can I talk to someone?"

We can help reduce stigma by talking about mental health with compassion instead of judgment and by treating emotional struggles as seriously as we would other health concerns.

You don't have to solve someone's problems.

Sometimes the most meaningful response is simply:

"I'm here."

"I'm listening."

"You matter to me."

"Let's find someone who can help."

Help Is Available

If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health or suicide-related crisis in the United States, call or text 988 to connect with the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.

You can also chat with the 988 Lifeline online.

If someone is in immediate life-threatening danger, call 911 or seek emergency medical assistance.

Don't Let the Conversation End in September

Suicide Prevention Month gives us an important opportunity to raise awareness, share resources, and start conversations.

But people need support in October.

They need it in January.

They need it on ordinary Tuesdays when there isn't an awareness campaign reminding us to check in.

So this September, make a commitment that extends beyond the month.

Check on the people you care about—not just today, but throughout the year.

Listen without judgment.

Take concerns seriously.

Reach out when something doesn't seem right.

And remind the people around you that asking for help is okay.

💜 You never know what someone may be carrying. A conversation, a check-in, or simply being present can matter more than you realize.